Back to the Heart

Doesn't matter how well we've played or accomplished in life, living without heart is not living indeed, it's not worth living at all. 

In these days you don't need tragedy, misery, addiction, depression, broken-hearted, affairs, etc etc to guide you to lose heart. Just some formula of: busyness and drivenness  will definitely lead you to live merely to survive, restlessly vulnerable. 

Moreover, our parents, our family and all those general public and even ourselves somehow always drive us crazy in being under compulsion to excel or succeed. (hayooo betul tidak??? *raising hand myself #confession) 

Just like when we read all those list of how-an-outclassing-woman-is in Proverbs 31, I'll definitely say: ohhhh I want to be like that, but.... I want to be the more "living" one version!

 I mean... just read that verse, don't you feel that lady is exhaustingly tired? She sounds soooooo busy anytime, wondering when will she has the me-time? some spa or massage maybe? 

I won't questioned this until the last two years when all the busyness eating myself slowly. I used to be silly enough to follow my heart doing things. Not just big things but also some little silly things such: I bargained with a "tukang Becak" before I ride his Becak, but then while riding, suddenly I hear some voice inside me that say "just give him more than you bargain and even more than he asked, surprise him and make him happy". So when I jumped off the Becak, I gave more than he asked (oon kan yah? diawal-awalnya nawar-nawar, giliran turun malah bayar lebih dari tarif yang dia minta haha) 

But guess what, doing something with heart is really something! I felt happier in an instant that time. 

Modern life, busyness, gadget and all the colony slowly assaulting the life of our heart. We became hi-tech-aware but we're not conscious of our surrounding and even ignorant to friends and families. I live in far far away kingdom which direct me to communicate more using the benefit of all those technology of course, so I force myself little by little putting the label of "being real whilst being with real people". So if I poke someone to chat then the other part is hanging out with friends I'll withdraw myself and "push" her/him away to be real with the friends (though most of the times the other part still want to talk and say: it's okay ..we all relaxing .. take it easy) But not for me, since I, myself, don't like to see if everyone so busy with the gadget while hanging out. (apa gunanya pergi bareng kalo gitu?) #curcol hihiihi...

Before I got too long....(karena sudah ada arah-arah kesana dan nanti akhirnya kemalaman lalu kurang tidur...)

 Let's back to the heart ;)

Good night!